“We understand death for the first time when he puts his hand upon one whom we love.” Madame de Stael

It is of course universal but only meaningful when it becomes personal. I am learning that what you did (and Mike McAllen and others) is one of the most powerful ways to celebrate a life, and life.

@Katie – I too never had children (though not for lack of trying!!) and have come to love my life, being able to serve as Auntie to so many literal nieces and nephews and then friends children (like Kaile, who you know from Beach Walks). If having children is about sharing love with others then the opportunities are boundless!

As for being a task-master, count me in too. I wondered if anyone would be offended even that I wrote this post so close to his death but talking about business and even adding a howto at the end.

For me, all of this, including the social web, is part of what makes life such a rich and enriching experience in these times.

@Mike McAllen – I am sorry they did not give you a copy of the site, tho knowing first hand how messy servers can get, maybe some IT guy deleted it without really knowing??? (ever the optimist…) I’ve wondered in passing how long to leave this one up and decided that is something to decide much much later.

I too often don’t know what to say in death. I feel waves of sadness but they are the energy of the moment and are not a persistent dark cloud. I believe without a doubt we choose to come here, we come many times, and that we are connected still though in different ways.

Lost my dad 9 years ago. He was my best friend. I think about him almost everyday. I made a similar website which I asked friends and family to send me stories. They were so funny and gave you a feel (like williampbenton.com.) of what kind of a person he was. The owners of my old company who was pretty great to me during the time he was sick with cancer while my new beautiful wife and I took care of him in a hospice situation unfortunately turned sour. I left and started my own company and they had hurt feelings. They offered to host the site and when i left the company I recently found out they had pulled the tribute site. Kinda petty, but its business I guess.

So I need to build a new one for him.

Thank you for sharing this post and showing me your fathers site. You and Shane constantly amaze me.

I really didnt know what to post here. But I wanted to post something, and I do know what you are going/went through and you have so much love in your life as I do. We are really lucky.

Your friend,
Mike

I’ve given just a little thought to these things lately because I’m reaching a milestone birthday and have come to accept my infertility. Instead of children, my legacy will be the relationships I nurture. Unfortunately, I can often be more task-oriented than people-oriented. So I am mindful of that tendency and gently bring my focus back when it wanders. Not to say there aren’t times when I must knuckle down and tackle that to-do list! But based on what I see of Beachwalks, Rox, I know you ‘get it.’

Thanks for sharing and encouraging me to share!

Very sorry for your loss.

What a wonderful tribute, and also what a great experience it must be to now see your Dad through the eyes and hearts of others who knew him.

I lost a couple of dear friends in the last few years, and the first thing I did was write down stories of us, our experiences together, humorous accounts, adventures—things their families would never have known, but would enjoy hearing. That was more important than flowers or anything else. I shared those anecdotes on printed paper, photos and videos. Your approach takes it a step further, and not only gives people an opportunity to share stories and feelings about your Dad with you and your loved ones, but it also affords everyone an opportunity to help each other grieve through sharing with one another on the blog.

You’re a good daughter. Your Dad must’ve been very proud.

Sincerely,

Dave Cynkin
Co-Founder, CMO, Sleep Deprivationist & Thrill Seeker
BlogWorld & New Media Expo