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Why I Rarely Answer My Phone

by Roxanne Darling on August 5, 2010

mute button by woodleywonderworks on FlickrIncreasingly, as a digital native, citizen of the internet, geek girl – call me what you wish – I find myself more and more discerning about how, when, and with whom I use the phone.

It is simply another trending practice that all marketers would be wise to note: Interruption of any kind is increasingly irritating and unnecessary in today’s world of technology and community. Consider this yet another free tip from your early adopter, Rox.

Clive Thompson in Wired.com captures the sentiment perfectly:

Consider: If I suddenly decide I want to dial you up, I have no way of knowing whether you’re busy, and you have no idea why I’m calling…. Plus, voice calls are emotionally high-bandwidth, which is why it’s so weirdly exhausting to be interrupted by one. (We apparently find voicemail even more excruciating: Studies show that more than a fifth of all voice messages are never listened to.)

The bold emphasis is mine. FYI our insider club of precious clients have phone access to me 24/7; you folks are listed in my Caller ID. Yet even with you/them I don’t always answer immediately. Because I have more than one client, I often choose not to drop my work on Client A to answer a call from Client B. I will listen to the voice mail as soon as I “come up for air” and will respond accordingly.

So let me explain “come up for air.”

The nature of my work is very brain intensive. When I sit down to craft a proposal or to build a blog or troubleshoot a marketing problem, I go deep into many layers of experience, technology, human behavior, internet psychology, the client’s budget level, etc. It is not a casual exercise. I have on average, 8-10 different software applications that I run concurrently.

In these busy times, I am ever more committed to using my time efficiently, as the various social web communities would otherwise tug at me literally 24/7. I not only would be severely lacking in sleep and recreation, I would not be getting anything done! Meaning – completed, finished, to-do item checked done.

To be interrupted throughout the day by ringing phones with a whole different set of (sometimes random) questions causes me to have to be yanked out of “the zone” which I consider a dis-service to my clients (my efficiency for them just crashed) and it is certainly taxing on my energy. And trust me – you all want me happy not cranky, right?

Why I Generally Prefer DIgital Communication

  • It can be sent and consumed at mutually convenient, self-directed time frames.
  • It can be sent and consumed using mutually convenient, self-directed devices/platforms.
  • It provides a written record; that saves so many brain cells from trying to remember things!
  • That written record lowers error rates and confusion over deliverables. Yes, it takes my billable time to write up the notes – but you are so well-served by my laying things out so clearly for you to consider over time.
  • It can slow down the process, allowing answers to appear without anyone being interrupted. Feelings of urgency are not always accurate.

So even though you’ll hear me say, “I get waaay too much email!” don’t confuse that with “I would SO much rather get a descriptive email with a handy subject than a phone call almost any day!”

Understanding the phone preference

Often, people who phone just want an answer to their question now (don’t we all!), or they are not that comfortable with email (join KnowHow Cafe where the smart people come to get smarter), or they don’t want to take the time to write out their question (you’ll be the main beneficiary of doing this!), or they are shielding the conversation specifically from a written record (hehe, no comment).

What’s more polite, phone or digital?

So while those of you who like to use the phone may consider those of us who don’t answer rude or selfish, here’s an upbeat take on things from Clive:
The telephone, in other words, doesn’t provide any information about status, so we are constantly interrupting one another. The other tools at our disposal are more polite. Instant messaging lets us detect whether our friends are busy without our bugging them, and texting lets us ping one another asynchronously. (Plus, we can spend more time thinking about what we want to say.) For all the hue and cry about becoming an “always on” society, we’re actually moving away from the demand that everyone be available immediately.

Let’s treat the phone as a really valuable business tool and make appointments for phone calls! We can leverage our powerful connections together IRL to their maximum by using the best tool for the job. Want to talk to me? Just send a quick email with your general topic and list some times you are available. I’ll get back to you. Keep ringing me up and not leaving any details in your voicemail while I am immersed in delivering services to someone else? It could take days to get a response.

Photo Credit: Mute by woodlywonderworks on Flickr.

Aloha,
roxanne-sig

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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

Bill Cammack August 12, 2010 at 4:41 pm

Excellent breakdown, as usual, Rox. :D

I never answer the phone and almost never check my phone messages.

The only exceptions are for friends I happen to want to talk to right then (emotional issues, as you mentioned) and clients that I scheduled speaking to or that I need input from at this point in the project I’m working on for them.

Video Editing requires me to “live” in the project, so I can’t afford to be interrupted and pulled out of my immersion.

I inform people that they can email me and I’ll get back to them when I get back to them. The other option is Instant Messaging, but that’s again available to clients whose projects I’m currently dealing with AND that I need to hear from in order to move forward with their project.

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Roxanne Darling August 12, 2010 at 4:51 pm

Hey Bill – You don’t listen to your voice mail? That could possibly be explained by our age difference. I hear that about 20 and 30 somethings frequently. That is a little too brave new future for me though I admire you being on IM – I find that just as interrupting UNLESS I am actively collaborating. Then it rocks – being able to share comments and links back and forth as I make things happen in real time.

Thank YOU for leaving a real live warm-blooded comment too!

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Bill Cammack August 12, 2010 at 5:02 pm

You’re welcome, Rox. :)

To expand on my point, what I do is very “Set it and forget it”. I need to know what the client wants, arrange to receive the media and then it’s off to the races for me until it’s time for the client to review the project. In between that time, there’s nothing I need to know from them unless there’s a change in the parameters of the job.

If there IS a change, that means that I need to have it via email anyway, because talking on the phone wastes even MORE of my time and mental energy as I have to take notes about something that the person could and SHOULD have just typed to me in the first place. I’ll check the email when I come up for air or depending on the situation, I’ll leave my Mail App open and polling every 60 seconds so I can receive correspondence in a timely fashion.

The reason I don’t check voicemail is that I don’t offer to anyone to call me on the phone. My friends all know to email, text or IM me. The only reason I would check is if a call came through from a client who had an open project with me, even though I would have explained to them beforehand that for record-keeping purposes AND for them to get the best service from me during their billable hours that they need to email me.

On top of that, all of my contact information is on the internet. If you happened upon my telephone number, that means you saw my email address as well and perhaps even my twitter and Facebook links. If someone calls and doesn’t get a response, the intelligent move is to try another avenue instead of banging one’s head against a brick wall and continuing to call and get ignored. :)

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Roxanne Darling August 12, 2010 at 5:03 pm

@ Bill: “If someone calls and doesn’t get a response, the intelligent move is to try another avenue instead of banging one’s head against a brick wall and continuing to call and get ignored. :)” LOVE IT!

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Mike Moon August 13, 2010 at 1:40 am

I’m on a tight budget, but I still require portable communication to keep in touch with family and friends.
So, I signed up for a Pay-As-You-Go phone, with unlimited Text Messages and Internet access for $18/month.
Oh sure, I pay through the nose when I make/receive a call … so I don’t! I’ve told everyone not call unless it’s life or death, but feel free to text me until their hearts content.
It works very well!
Good article.

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Roxanne Darling August 13, 2010 at 1:06 pm

@Mike – Unlimited texting really covers the mark. And when we had our little earthquake here a few years back, phone did not work tho SMS did!

Looking at the “emotionally high bandwidth” cost to phone call interruptions as Clive mentioned, you’ve added context here. Dollars and attention in the mix. Thanks for stopping by. Any more lake walks lately?

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Lauren Lionheart August 14, 2010 at 2:54 am

YES on all accounts! Multi-tasking is a huge killer of productivity. One thing at a time please.

I like the perspective that digital communication is more polite AND allows us to stay committed to the task at hand. So true.

Thanks for your insight, Roxanne.

Peace,

Lauren

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Roxanne Darling August 14, 2010 at 9:33 am

@Lauren – I used to think of myself as a queen multitasker – and I can still talk on the phone while doing dishes – but I have always been a big fan of having dedicated time and space to get certain things done.

Funny side note – my purse was stolen from my car last night, and sure enough, it had my phone in it. No one will be able to call me until I get that replaced! Sometimes life just cracks me up. LOL.

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Andrea of Online Marketing Muscle August 19, 2010 at 6:12 pm

I don’t answer my phone unless I am expecting an important call. That’s what voicemail is for! I find even more annoying about the phone is call waiting! I have disabled this from all of my phones. Unless it is an emergency I don’t see the reason for it. It is essentially telling the person you are on the line with that “oh, wait, this other call might be more interesting than you!” :)

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Maureen Sharib October 4, 2010 at 9:37 pm

NEWSFLASH
Roxanne, Darling:
Customer B doesn’t give a rat’s ass about Customer A.
All Customer B wants is your immediate and undivided attention.
Letting Customer B know that another customer has priority over them is dangerous business.
I have a hard and fast rule for building (and keeping) any type of business: answer your phone. If you don’t want to do it yourself (because it’s so weirdly exhausting) hire someone to do it for you.
You’re not going to change (any time soon) human interaction that answers immediate (and sometimes emotional) needs.
Consider this a free tip from an old adopter.

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Roxanne Darling October 14, 2010 at 1:19 pm

@Maureen – Thanks so much for adding your opposing view. I do understand that is how many in business think – and emotional desires (I don’t count them as “needs”) are important and I do consider them. But I don’t believe in letting others emotional needs dictate business relationships. I prefer to have consciousness in action, and that means both me and my clients occasionally experiencing some short term discomfort for the long term benefit of more efficient work habits and mutual respect!

Back before there were no email or numerous other communication channels that exist today, your position would be valid. Today? I think letting other peoples’ perceived urgency interrupt my work for others promotes a needy, inefficient, and immature work place. That’s just my opinion, and I am glad that you have a system that works for you!

Aloha, Roxanne

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Bill Cammack October 14, 2010 at 6:06 pm

On top of what Rox just said, each person or company gets to choose how they feel like interacting with their clients. If someone wants to use the phone and I don’t, that’s too bad for them.

One of the problems with the phone is you get into arguments about who said what. That’s eliminated with email correspondence because it’s right there in Black & White what you said and what the other person said.

Do I miss out on business by not answering my phone? Yes.

Am I more efficient with the business I AM doing because I don’t answer my phone? Yes.

I’d rather provide value more quickly to my current clients and to myself than to cater to how someone else feels like communicating with me.

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Roxanne Darling March 19, 2011 at 10:40 pm

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